What Is Edging?

Your Full Guide to Orgasm Control for Deeper, More Satisfying Sexual Experiences

Learning to understand, delay, and control orgasm — commonly through a technique called edging — can enrich your sex life, heighten pleasure, and help you better understand your own arousal patterns. This guide explains what edging is, how to do it, its benefits, potential side effects, and why experimentation may be worth your while.

Edging involves stopping sexual stimulation right before you reach orgasm, pausing for roughly 30 seconds, and then resuming stimulation. This process is repeated until you ultimately decide to orgasm.

Also known as surfing, peaking, teasing, and other names, edging is the art of interrupting stimulation at the exact moment you feel close to climax — hovering at the “edge” before release. Although often discussed today as a way to achieve “better orgasms,” edging is not a new concept. In fact, it is more than a half-century old treatment for premature ejaculation.

In 1956, James H. Semans published a paper in the Journal of Sexual Medicine introducing what is now known as the stop-start method, designed to help individuals with premature ejaculation last longer.

Edging may sound like a quick fix for improving sexual satisfaction, but it functions more like a long-term practice — a marathon rather than a sprint. It takes time, body awareness, and patience. More holistically, edging can deepen your understanding of your sexual responses, promote mindfulness, and enhance connection in both solo and partnered sex.

Understanding the 4 Stages of Arousal

Sexual experimentation is essential for a healthy sex life. Learning how your body responds reduces anxiety and increases awareness — both key components of edging.

Before practicing edging, it helps to understand the four stages of the sexual response cycle:

1. Excitement

• Increased skin flushing

• Muscle tension

• Faster heartbeat

• Increased blood flow to the penis, clitoris and vagina

• Vaginal lubrication

• Scrotal retraction

2. Plateau

Everything from the excitement phase intensifies. You move closer and closer to orgasm — and this is when you should slow down or stop stimulation while edging.

3. Orgasm

A wave of nerve and muscle reactions creates intense pleasure. This includes vaginal lubrication and ejaculation from the penis. During edging, this is the stage you intentionally delay until you’re ready.

4. Resolution

Body tissues return to their non-aroused state, and vital signs normalize. This stage includes the refractory period, a temporary window — lasting minutes to days — in which arousal and orgasm aren’t possible.

Everyone experiences these stages differently, which is why self-exploration is so important. Research shows that masturbating and experimenting with different techniques helps you become familiar with your arousal, improves sexual satisfaction, and benefits your relationships and sexual health.

Five Ways to Try Edging at Home

Edging begins with learning to recognize the moment right before orgasm — the space between the plateau and climax. Expect trial and error.

The Stop-Start Method (Solo)

1. Create your ideal environment
Lock the door, dim the lights, play music, or use aromatherapy.

2. Get into the physical mood
Close your eyes and touch yourself until you’re aroused.

3. Begin masturbating

Use stimulation techniques that you know typically bring you to orgasm.

4. Pause when you’re about to come
Stop or slow down your movements. Take deep breaths or open your eyes if needed.

5. Refocus on your sensations

Notice tension, excitement, sweating, trembling — whatever you feel.

6. Resume stimulation

Continue masturbating, repeating the stop-start pattern as many times as you want.

7. Let yourself orgasm
When you finally climax, you may notice added intensity or duration.

The Stop-Start Method (With a Partner)

1. Begin with foreplay or positions that arouse either partner.
This can include oral sex, G-spot stimulation, nipple play, or other pleasure-focused activities.

2. Communicate clearly. Your partner should tell you when they are close to orgasm.

3. Slow down or stop stimulation. Wait for them to return to the plateau phase.

4. Resume stimulation. Repeat until they want to orgasm.

The Squeeze Method (for People With Penises)

1. Get aroused.

2. Stimulate yourself until you are near orgasm.

3. Squeeze the head of the penis right before climax to stop it.

4. Wait 30 seconds, then begin stimulating again.

Ballooning (for Premature Ejaculation)

1. Identify the most sensitive area on your penis.

2. Rub only that area gently in a circular motion.

3. Continue until fully hard and nearing orgasm.

4. Stop touching right before climax.

5. Allow partial softness, then start again.

Repeat without allowing orgasm. Ballooning trains you to manage arousal and delay ejaculation.

Using a Vibrator

Some vibrators offer biofeedback, measuring how your body reacts as you use them. With a vibrator, you can experiment with:

• Penetration depth

• Vibration speed

• Rhythm

• Angles

Use your creativity and curiosity.

Benefits of Edging

1. Helps Individuals (Especially Those With Vaginas) Orgasm More Easily

A 2014 study of 96 women found that those who masturbated were more likely to orgasm — often because masturbation reduces anxiety around sexual pleasure and helps people learn what arouses them.

The more time you spend getting to know your own body, the more you will discover about what arouses you or gets you aroused. Not knowing may result in unfulfilling sexual experiences and contribute to increased anxiety about sex.

2. Reduces Embarrassment and Builds Confidence

A 2006 study of nearly 2,000 women revealed that up to 75% experienced sexual dysfunction but hesitated to discuss it with a doctor. Edging gives you insight and confidence to talk about your sexual health with your partner or a healthcare provider.

3. Expands Sexual Possibilities Beyond Penetration

A 2018 study with over 1,000 women found:

• 36.6% can orgasm only through clitoral stimulation

• 18% can orgasm from intercourse alone

Edging encourages exploration of various forms of stimulation, benefiting both solo and partnered sex.

When to Stop Edging and Let Yourself Orgasm

If you’re solo, you can choose to climax at any moment.

If you’re with a partner, communication is essential. Use signals or safe words to express readiness. Be aware of:

Half or Disappearing Orgasms:

Sometimes delaying too long disrupts the full-body orgasmic experience.

For People With Penises: Dry Orgasms

You may feel like you’re coming but no semen is released. This is natural, not harmful, and usually not related to fertility issues. If concerned, seek medical advice.

Potential Side Effects and Misconceptions

Delayed Ejaculation

This condition is usually psychological and linked to stress or anxiety about not climaxing.

“Blue Balls” (Epididymal Hypertension)

Contrary to myths, it causes no long-term harm. Discomfort can be relieved using the Valsalva manoeuvre (hold your nose and exhale until your ears pop).

Relationship Impact

If edging becomes prioritized over mutual pleasure, it may lead to distress, reduced sexual satisfaction, or conflict. Mutual consent and communication with your partner are crucial.

If you’re unable to orgasm even when you want to, seek guidance from a doctor or sexual health professional.

Is Edging Worth Trying?

Absolutely. Sexual experimentation helps you discover what feels good for your body. Not every technique will suit you — and that’s perfectly normal.

Edging might be challenging initially, but for many people the heightened intensity after waiting makes the final orgasm feel especially powerful. You won’t know unless you try, and the process itself can be just as rewarding as the climax.